Ultrasound pictures

Here are the pictures of our wonderful little bundle of joy #3- another little boy! The top image is my favorite and looks like he is laughing!

This is another 3D image and he is smiling with his hands up by his face.

This one is of him lying on his back looking up, and you are looking at him from the side so you see his profile.

Enjoy....

It's a boy!!!

After waiting 4.5 months we found out today that we are having another little boy! It's funny. Now that I know what we are having I am so excited. I want to plan the baby room (he'll share with his older brother). I want to get a name picked out NOW. I want to sort through baby clothes. Either way I would have been this excited, but it's nice to finally be over joyed about this new little addition to our family. I can't imagine the chaos that a third child will bring into our lives, especially since the parents will now be out numbered- time for a zone defense I guess.

What a huge blessing. I'm already seeing "blue" everywhere!

Grow strong little one...I love you.

Updates...

So apparently people follow me on my blog, that never talk to me- too weird. Why don't people just pick up the phone and call or drop a friendly email? So for all those nosey people out there, and those that actually care to know what's new in my life here we go-

I've been over my post-partum depression for a month now- yeah:) It seems to just hit for about 2 months when I wean a kid and then suddenly it's gone- thankfully:)

We are moved in and settled into our new and wonderful house. I love it. Yes there are little things I'd like to change, but who doesn't think that when they own their house? I love having people over and am so glad that we now have a comfortable spare room/bathroom so guests are no longer sleeping on our futon in our living room:) Although they didn't complain...this will entice people to come over and stay more- come grandparents come...we love the help and the kids LOVE having you around:)

I still have my job at Agilent. I feel horrible for all those that don't anymore and am glad many people landed on thier feet- but pray for those that haven't yet. I feel more blessed this Christmas than I have felt (even though I was) in a long time. So many people are in need, or maybe just in need of a friendly smile if nothing else. I wish people I knew felt easier about asking for help. It would make it easier to help them instead of trying to do it sneaky and guessing if they need help or not. I pray that if I ever need help physically, emotionally, or financially that I'm not too proud or ashamed to ask. It's especially hard for us Landis's I know that...but I also know without a doubt that any of my friends or family would help me on a dime- and have in the past- if I ever needed it and I just wish others felt free enough (even in confidentiality) to just ask. Please never hesitate to ask us for help...we are here. We love you all.

We find out in 1.5 hours if boys or girls will rule this howard household...dun dun dun....
I can only think of a girls name, Phoebe Alane and for a boys name no clue on the first but the middle will be after my dad, Dean, his middle name (and my brothers too:) ).

If we have a little boy he and Nehemiah will be so close they can share a room, clothes, etsc....but if we have a little girl maybe Miah won't feel like he got kicked out of being the baby too soon as he will be the only boy. As long as they are healthy I don't care. Honestly I have no "intuition" on either. I've had 1/2 of the symptoms I had with Abby and 1/2 the symptoms I had with Miah...so right now only God knows....

Update coming soon:)

Just Old...

I don't care if nobody understands my feelings right now. I can hardly understand them myself. I just know that buying our first home is not giving me the joy I always anticipated. I know that is due to the post-partum depression I'm going through- but it's still hard for my normally logical brain to comprehend why I can't be over joyous with this amazing house. It's more than I expected for our first home. It's overwhelming. In addition buying a formal dining room set complete with china hutch it just made me feel so old. not mature, but old. It's something I would only expect to see in my parents house or grandmothers house, not mine. Don't get me wrong, I've always wanted one and am so happy that we got a brand new set for only $750 due to a divorce (not happy on that), but it sits in the garage reminding me that I'm now the parent with a mortgage, 2 kids+, job, and things that only my parents used to have. I see how Abby thinks we are so old and we are her parents. But I don't feel as "together" as my parents seemed to me when I was growing up. I look around my messy house, wrinkled laundry, unmade bed and just feel like I'm pretending to be an adult. But now with the house and new furniture I just feel old. Again not mature, just old. I'm not sure I like it one bit at all. I know I should be so grateful that all this craziness is for good reasons, but my logical brain can't outweigh the heaviness in my heart still. I sure hope this post-partum depression is over soon, or it will rob me of any joy of buying our new house and having our third child.

This pregnancy still isn't real

This pregnancy still doesn't seem real to me, aside from the fact that I am so tired and Josh is having to do almost everything around here. I still can't believe I have another little life form inside me- and that their heart is formed. Their teeth are formed. And they are 1 inch "tall" now. I will love this baby. I'm excited Abigail and Nehemiah will have another sibling. But I'm still not ready. I have 6 1/2 more months to "get ready" I guess. It makes me feel guilty that I'm not anxiously awaiting this little one like the last 2. Especially with all the people I know who are trying to have a baby, or can't have children. That makes me feel even worse. Maybe I have so much going on right now with buying a house my mind is elsewhere. Maybe once we set up the crib and baby room it will be more real. Maybe when I feel those first little kicks inside me. Oh I pray it's so. This child is a blessing- but oh so unexpected.

Emotional about our move

I saw 10 deer between our house and dropping off Nehemiah this morning. It made me sad. I doubt I'll see so many deer in our new neighborhood as it's much further from the mountains. Then I drove by Ute valley park, the open forest area, and the playground that are all so close to our house, and I started to tear up. Granted- I'm pregnant. But this is the first house we've lived in where we love our neighbors, and neighborhood, and both are so close to work. I'm really going to miss that so much. I'm not looking forward to a 20+ minute commute (which I know is average for most people) and getting to know new neighbors who may or may not be nice. Our landlord also posted a "for rent" sign in our front yard- ouch! Every time we come or go it's staring at us and reminds us of our upcoming move. I'm very very excited about our new house...but for today...I'm really really sad we'll be moving.

just another night

It's just another night here in the Howard household. Nehemiah is asleep peacefully in his crib. Josh is reading Abby her "5" books before bed. And I'm anxiously awaiting my "friends" on FB to play their next word on scrabble so I can play again. I'm addicted. I usually have about 15 games going at any one time to keep busy. Tonight, I'm keeping busy to ignore the sticky table with syrup on it from this mornings breakfast, and the crumbs on the floor from dinner, and the laundry waiting to be folded, and the toys not picked up, and the shoes that need to be polished, and the fridge that needs to be emptied out of yogurt long since expired. Yes tonight I'm just sitting here- loving life, but not my messy house.